Mundane

So today at church the pastor was talking about Exodus, the final talk in a series. Earlier they explained Exodus was a compound word meaning the "way out." Each week they has asked us to consider what we think God is leading us out of, but not to stop there.

God was leading his people out of Egypt into the promised land and into relationship with him. Jim proposed that the Exodus did not end when the Isrealites entered Canaan, but that it is also the journey that God is still leading his children on to this day. Through Jesus God is leading us on the way out, out of sin and death to Him.

He said one thing today that really stuck with me. "The miraculous becomes the mundane in no time."

The story of the Exodus is not one of God taking the quickest path to move his people from Egypt to the promised land. It is a story of God proclaiming his power and intentions to his people and the world. He lead his people on a longer path to Canaan to show them more and more that he loved them and provides for them. And many days all they could do is follow him.

So many times I, and I think we all, say "If only I had a pillar of fire/ smoke to follow." "If only I say the sea part before me to show me the way." We want miracles to guide us... I want them more than ever now that I can't default to the goal that has driven me since I could think rationally "graduate from college."

But God did that for his people and do you see where that got them? No where further than we get with our every day lives and interaction with him. We see in Numbers 13 that the spies that were sent did not believe they could take the land that God had given them.

All of God's miracles and all of the comments from us reading the story saying "Well if I saw THAT I would trust God" did not mean anything. They were scared, as they had every right to be.

Miracles can become mundane. If we could call them at our will we would control God, not the other way around. And miracles or not we all come to the point of making a choice...

"Knowing what I know of God, do I trust him enough to go and do this?"

People who have experienced far more miricles and those who have experienced far fewer have all made this choice. Some said yes, and we remember them as men and women of God. Other said no.

So, what choice do I make? What choice do you make?

Where I Am

So I have not posted here in a while. Life has been good and bad at the same time, and definitely busy.

I have been noticing the lack of community rather acutely recently.

Last week I saw my girlfriend for about 3 hours and one of my bestfriends, who also lives with me, for about 20 minuets. In the evenings alone I watched a lot of Hulu and felt like crap. I felt alone and started to see trains of thought that I thought were long behind me come back.

I was journaling at church today I started to recall some things I used to take for granted when I was in IV before graduating that I took for granted that I really miss now.

1. Being asked how God and I are on a regular basis at random by many different people.
2. Having a community of people to serve.
3. People to discuss my day with or plans for the future.
4. A group of people that were not afraid to challenge me.
5. A place to be reminded of who God is when I forget.

I have only experienced a small bit of this since graduation and the other graduates moving from this end of the state. With Jamie being a small group leader we have gotten to have a few awesome talks about how that is going with her and sometimes Joe and I talk.

But both of them have been on mostly opposite schedules of mine as of late and busy themselves. Plus most of Joe and my conversations have been about business-y things lately as we both are rather either arrogant or ambitious (not sure which) and trying to start many different enterprises.

I have not joined a church yet because I have not gone around and check out some of the ones I have heard about. I have been going mostly to [nlcf] because it is what I am used to and where Jamie and Michael (my little brother) go. The sermons have also been on Exodus lately and I have found them really interesting and applicable.

Not until today, however, did I consider the possibility that I was simply over thinking my church choice. They do many of the things I want to be involved with and have an older congregation I could get to know. And today I also realized that Joe, Jamie, and Michael all go there and are most of the people I actually see on a regular basis. After a week of minimal human interaction it is nice to see people that I love.

So now the question is do I decided to look at other places, that would be better in some ways and not in others, or do I decide the seeing my brother and girlfriend on Sunday mornings is a good reason to pick a church for the time being?

Being an over-thinker sucks. But regardless of the source I need to find community soon, because I cannot live this life alone.